16 March, cycle 2A

One of my favorite nurse’s assistants came into my room last night to check my vitals and when she recognized me she gave this cute little SQUEEE, hopped up and down and then came and gave me a hug! It’s sort of nice to be liked, I suppose…😄❤️

So, I think I may have hit my plateau before the crash. The same thing happened during the last A cycle – I felt a bit yucky after the bulk of the chemo had been administered and then I leveled off and felt pretty good for a few days before completely tanking. Something similar may happen again, or it may not, or some other weird thing may occur. I really have no idea. Right now I’m just along for the ride and hoping that I can have at least a few days of break with my family when this part of the cycle is over.

This afternoon a very fortunate person finished their chemo treatments and was finally going home for good. How do I know this? Mounted on the wall opposite the nurses’ station, right beside the hallway that leads to the public bank of elevators, is a sturdy white brass ship’s bell with a short hefty rope attached to the clapper. Every time a patient finishes treatment and goes home for the last time, they get to ring this bell. I heard the bell ring followed by cheers and applause from the nursing staff. It was really, really cool, and I wish this person continued good health and happiness. Gotta admit, I’m also envious!

Overall, I think I had a pretty good day today. I was able to keep my spirits up for the most part and I’ve had some interesting and fun conversations with some of my nurses and PCAs. I can now just drift into the bathroom to pee or take my shower any time I feel like it thanks to being detached from the ball and chain. This is a HUGE deal for me. I detest feeling dependent and it makes me feel so despondent when I have to holler and then wait for assistance to do the simplest of things. It’s part of life here in the hospital and I do try to make the most of it but there are times when it really begins to weigh on me.

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