19 May – cycle 3A


The sun is creeping into my room a little bit further every morning. Starting around 6:45 I can see her bright eye as she begins to peek above the horizon, sending a slender beam through my window. This is the only time I get to see the sun during the day on this side of the hospital tower but I’m grateful for every last second. It’s 7:25 now and the angle has already changed and moved a bit further to the south. Still, it’s a nice bright morning although it’s a bit hazy on the horizon. The quality of the air out there looks a lot like the LA pollution we native southern Californians are so familiar with. Honestly, there are days when I’ll step outside here at home, take a deep breath, and immediately think of the way the air smelled while in art college in Pasadena during the early 80s. There is no AQMD here and it shows!

Bring on the Granix. I just received my first injection. Considering my counts have crashed and my one remaining offending digit has basically quit healing, I’m not surprised. I’m more concerned now about my left big toe than anything else at this point. The tissue looks healthy and pink but the open area is still a bit weepy and I don’t dare go without any sort of wound dressing. It’ll be two weeks this coming Friday since the nail was removed and I had hoped that the progress would be better but the poor piddy is fighting an uphill battle! Its neighbor on the right foot is all full of itself, drying out, glowing pink and already sporting the beginnings of a new nail. I think my left big toe is developing an inferiority complex…😆

Welp, the word has gone out that we incarcerated animals are once again allowed out of our rooms for walkies. Mind you, we have to agree that we do it at our own risk, but this all came about because of a patient here who has been on the unit for MONTHS, with no breaks, and he’s quite literally going batsh*t crazy with hospital delirium. Mary Ellen, one of our charge nurses and one of my favorites, went to the unit supervisor and argued that this simply couldn’t continue, that for the guy’s own health and sanity he would HAVE to be allowed out. Of course, the other patients who are reasonably ambulatory have also been given permission (it’s only fair, right?) so as long as we wear our masks and stay at least six feet away from everyone else, and as long as we TOUCH NOTHING and wash our hands thoroughly once we return to our cells, we’re good to go. We’ve been told that if we do decide to walk the unit, we should do it about an hour after evening shift change when everything has quieted down and there are fewer people in the halls. I’m usually turning into a bleary zombie by 8pm so I don’t anticipate doing much walking!

BLURGH…. Having a non-functional immune system seriously sucks. I’m a wreck right now. Think it’s time to pack it in for the night.😴😴😴